Flag On the Play

It seems like nearly every team sport in the world uses some sort of flag to indicate a foul. Referees fling them in the air, wave them on sticks, hold up little cards that represent flags, usually accompanied by some sort of whistle blowing. All of these signals indicate that someone has done something they shouldn't and play will now cease until a penalty has been assessed. I wish that relationships worked that way. TWEET! Forgot the birthday! Five yard penalty! FWEET! Lack of romance! 24 hours in the penalty box! WHEET! Failure to express emotions! You're outta here! *dirt kicking and hat throwing ensues* Unfortunately there aren't any of those things, so we just keep cruising along, scoring willy nilly* when maybe we should have slowed down or backed up a little. I mean there are flags. Some are tiny, some are huge, flaming red, and waving in your face, but there's nothing there to enforce the penalty. You can stop and take a closer look at that play, but often it's more fun to keep the game going than really examine that flag, especially when you've just begun. Everything is all a new, exciting, rush of breathlessness. And we all do stuff that could mean a red flag to someone else. Past addiction issues, commitment issues, still stuck on the ex issues, entire bloody subscriptions worth of issues, but how do you tell which ones are the ones that should be show stoppers and which are just little speed bumps? When you're sitting having coffee on that first date do you stop mid-conversation and say "Whoa there! That thing you just told me about you is a deal breaker," and walk out? I'd hate to have someone make that kind of judgment about me during our first conversation without really getting to know me, and yet I know I've learned things about people in the first moments of discussion that made me pause, and eventually resulted in exactly what I was concerned about from the start. How do I figure out when to let it ride and when to take my ball and go home?

*The phrase "willy nilly" makes me giggle like a loon for no apparent reason other than words are funny. Willy nilly! Mwahahahaha!

© Sarah Ultis 2011